Why is it difficult not to care about what others think of you?

It is difficult not to care about what others think of you because their feedback affects what we do and how we do it. It is in our human nature to be the best that we can be. If other people think negative thoughts about you and you hear them, most people will want to change to please them. We have to have constant companionship with friends and family. If others don't think highly of you and treat you in that manner, you won't be a happy person because you need them. Most humans can't bear to be alone for a long amount of time. Also we as humans want input. We don't like doing bad things, so we need people to tell us when we do something bad or inappropriate.

No, we do not control the way other people see and think about me. I may influence them, but never control what they feel toward and about me. No one can make anyone do anything. Our actions and thoughts are our own. Our actions and thoughts may be influenced by the media, such as family, friends, TVs, radios, magazines, etc..., but they don't make us see and think differently. When you said something that stirs a memory in someone else's past, they chose to bring that memory forward instead of blocking the memory. That memory may be a deep hatred or annoyance, but we did not cause them to feel that way or how they will feel about us.